Thursday, November 1, 2012

About pivotal moments....

I‘ve been thinking and doing lots of different things lately. Making new sketches. Throwing them to the waste paper basket. Working and destroying, and starting over again. Thinking. Walking. Making another sketches. And trying to make some sort of synthesis or finding some structure within everything I‘ve learned and seen, and establish a new balance.

It‘s always a challenge – feeling the change approaching and facing it. It demands to take risk, to let something go, to loosen a bit the expectations and so having enough freedom in mind and hands to get into it. It demands to take time and get ready for all the possible failures and that it may not work out as expected. It demands some excessive stubborness to keep digging despite of  thoughts like „Do you really believe it‘s worth your time and efforts“. Well,  I wouldn‘t have started this blog at all, if I were not stubborn that much and sort of "mentally" deaf to all the sceptical thoughts like above, and somehow persuaded, that I should go for it.

I keep telling to myself that the opportunities may be somehow hidden and not easy to get that bare-handed. I‘d like to derive something more systematical and revealing for myself from everything I‘ve recently tried and done. So now I‘m getting it all together and making my own rules, rules that will guide me.

Now I‘m feeling I‘ve got to some pivotal point, or maybe the first essential pivotal point being only one of them, and that‘s why I‘m talking about change. I‘ve already wrote a whole lot of words about opportunities, changes, risks before, and yes, the work flow at thoses times was somehow meandering, but going forward. Now I‘m more hopping back and forth, and fast. And this is sort of movement without clear focus, that‘s why I‘m talking about finding new structure and balance – to be able to move forward.

I‘ve had that will to focus on more learning instead of more doing, to get some fresh idea sources, to explore different corners of applied arts, to learn more about principles, to take my time and build some sort of system within. And I still have that will, though now I feel more incentive towards practical doing. 

There‘ll be a whole bunch of projects to share – like new dolls, new pouch designs, new sketches, and I wait till I feel that they are ready to get to this blog, till the established direction feels right, till I‘ve got that balance. I work with papier-maché, with modelling clay, I use all the ornamental techniques I‘ve recently learned, I work with more linen and wool (winter‘s approaching, I need to get my hands on something more warming and cuddly), and yes, of course, there‘s a lot of fabrics involved. 

In the meantime I learn making lace – thanks to that fabulous opportunity to get straight into the course for advanced lace makers.

No photos today – I‘ve forced myself to hold off, but they‘ll be coming soon.
Have a great week!

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